PART ONE:
I believe I have a disciplined mind-a one-way thinker. I think each blog I wrote improved from the last. I finally sorta understand the concept of blogging. Before, I just kept asking myself, "What's the point?". It took me a really long time to decide my topic, and even a longer time to choose my "Big ?". But I knew I had to learn how to blog, so I did. I couldn't spend all my time wondering why. I know how to focus on an assignment to get the job done, which proves why I believe my mind is disciplined.
PART TWO:
Throughout my blogging experience, I feel I really did take the time to see all the views of adoption. And I found that there are many, many different opinions.
I have also found myself engaged in intellectual discussions. Some of my posts are very controverial and I wasn't afraid to express my opinion. I was hoping for more debate, which would have allowed me to go deeper into how I believed. However, I put myself in a vulnerable position and, therefore, engaged myself in intellectual discussions on my post and in my research.
Because many of my posts are controversial, I did ask many provocative questions. I didn't really get a response the the questions like I thought I would. But topics like Same Sex adoption and embryo adoption are just asking for argument and debate.
PART THREE:
Throughout my blogging experience, I've not only learned a lot about adoption, but I've learned how to research and write about a topic in an untraditional way.
Donnerstag, 13. Mai 2010
Sonntag, 9. Mai 2010
Closed versus Open Adoption
So.. Closed adoption basically cuts off any communication or identification between birth parents and adoption parents and open adoption means to have an open relationship between the two.
I guess there are pros and cons for both, but I really don't know, since I am very unexperienced in adoption.
CLOSED: pros for birth parents: provides closure.. and privacy & cons: no choice in the adopting parents
pros for adopting parents: no chance of interference later in life & cons: no history on child.. might face a lot of explaining when your child gets older.
OPEN: pros for birth parents: less guilt, comfort in knowing where child is, an increased ability to have a role in child's life
& cons: no closure
pros for adopting parents: probably an easier life for the child, understand the child better through birth parents, & cons: a bigger chance of interference.. Will the birth mother want her child back?
I know a family who adopted openly and is now facing their child's birthgrandmother, who is fighting for legal rights to her grandaughter. They want to completely take away the baby, without any interference from the adopting couple. Once you've fallen in love with a child, you can't just give it back and once you've given up your rights to another loving couple, you can't take it away. I feel like closed adoptions could potentially remedy this problem. However, a lot of women probably would have a harder time giving up their baby completley. Without both options, many people would be drawn away from adoption. So, it's not a matter of which is better, it's a matter of which works best for each particular situation.
I guess there are pros and cons for both, but I really don't know, since I am very unexperienced in adoption.
CLOSED: pros for birth parents: provides closure.. and privacy & cons: no choice in the adopting parents
pros for adopting parents: no chance of interference later in life & cons: no history on child.. might face a lot of explaining when your child gets older.
OPEN: pros for birth parents: less guilt, comfort in knowing where child is, an increased ability to have a role in child's life
& cons: no closure
pros for adopting parents: probably an easier life for the child, understand the child better through birth parents, & cons: a bigger chance of interference.. Will the birth mother want her child back?
I know a family who adopted openly and is now facing their child's birthgrandmother, who is fighting for legal rights to her grandaughter. They want to completely take away the baby, without any interference from the adopting couple. Once you've fallen in love with a child, you can't just give it back and once you've given up your rights to another loving couple, you can't take it away. I feel like closed adoptions could potentially remedy this problem. However, a lot of women probably would have a harder time giving up their baby completley. Without both options, many people would be drawn away from adoption. So, it's not a matter of which is better, it's a matter of which works best for each particular situation.
Post-Adoption Baby Blues
PADS: Post Adoption Depression Syndrome.
Many parents work for years finding a child to adopt and convincing social workers and adoption agencies of their "superior parenting skills" that when they actually become parents, it isn't the dream world they've come to imagine. It seems dumb, I mean, shouldn't parenthood be a dream world? Shouldn't your adopted children mean everything to you? But then again, for years parents dream about having a child-imagining the best of all possible situations. Depression comes in that transition/adjustment period. It isn't very well-known because most mothers experiencing this suffer in silence. They feel ashamed that they might not love a child that they've worked so hard for. Women also feel like they don't have a right to feel depressed.. postpartum depression is caused by a change in hormones.. but adoption doesn't affect that. So why feel sad? I think it is something that no one can understand unless experienced, but this video can give you some insight.
Donnerstag, 6. Mai 2010
"Everday is Christmas"
I found this piece written by a man named Scott Mars, who was obviously adopted. I wanted to find different view points from actual adoptees... and he clearly had a very, very rewarding experience. I guess I should talk about why he thinks adopted parents are better than biological parents.
Mars assumes that parents who "accidentally" have kids are incapable of loving them. I agree that adults who adopt will probably always be loving, because of the long journey they've had to overcome. --Adoptive parents want so badly to be parents that when given the opportunity, they literally cherish every moment.Adoptive parents want so badly to be parents that when given the opportunity, they literally cherish every moment.-- "Adoptive parents want so badly to be parents that when given the opportunity, they literally cherish every moment." But then he goes on and on about how his friends had terrible lives, because they weren't adopted. He had loving parents, but so do I.
Mars assumes that parents who "accidentally" have kids are incapable of loving them. I agree that adults who adopt will probably always be loving, because of the long journey they've had to overcome. --Adoptive parents want so badly to be parents that when given the opportunity, they literally cherish every moment.Adoptive parents want so badly to be parents that when given the opportunity, they literally cherish every moment.-- "Adoptive parents want so badly to be parents that when given the opportunity, they literally cherish every moment." But then he goes on and on about how his friends had terrible lives, because they weren't adopted. He had loving parents, but so do I.
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